Tortoise's Failed Marriage
*I wrote this in middle school during a school unit on my culture. Not the best writing but pretty cute, I think, and pretty good for an 11-year-old.
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Chief Okwenkwe of Isu had many daughters; the youngest of all was Uchenna. Uchenna was a very beautiful and girl, and because of this, she was her father's favorite daughter. However, her heart was as black as stone, and she only wished to marry a wealthy man. The chief, blinded by her beauty, decided that he would grant his youngest daughter her request, and find her a handsome, rich husband. He married his other, kind hearted but ugly daughters to whomever asked for their hand in marriage. However the king would not let Uchenna marry anyone but the richest, most handsome man in the village and surrounding area.
There came a time when Mbe the tortoise, bored and lonely, decided he would like to take Uchenna as his bride. Mbe knew, however, that he was not rich or handsome enough to satisfy the tastes of the superficial Uchenna, so he began to form a plan to fool Uchenna and the chief into thinking that he was the richest, most handsome creature in Igbo land.
On the morning of the day he planned to marry Uchenna, he first went to the Palace of Lion. Lion had the largest hut except for the chief, but although he was very large, he was also very dumb. Mbe rapped on the door and waited. Lion came out and roared, until he saw small tortoise sitting on the step, his head poking out of his shell.
"Please Lion" said Mbe, trying to sound small and meek "Please, I heard some very disturbing news that I thought I might share with you. The lion in the next town, Chikere, has been saying that you are nothing but a dumb house-cat. He has insulted your honor, and insists that he can beat you in personal combat. I would tell you to go defend your honor, except there is rumor that he plans to draw you out to steal your palace. Please, let me guard it while you’re gone. I am very small, but I am smart enough to fool anybody who comes this way."
His speech worked, and as Lion prepared his house for his journey, Mbe hurried to beat him to the market.
On his way to the market, he saw some Peacocks sitting by the road, and got a marvelous idea. Running as fast as he could, he shouted "Peacocks! Peacocks!" The easily startled birds gathered around him immediately. He then began another tale. "Soon, Lion will come running down this road, looking for you. Some idiot has told him that you all mean to steal his house, and he won't listen to reason in his angered state. Please! Give me your feathers. Without them, he won't recognize you, and he'll just keep running." The startled peacocks quickly obliged, and soon all of them were featherless, and Mbe was fully covered in dazzling feathers that made his appearance magnificent to behold.
As he continued towards the market, he saw a man waiting with a beautiful carriage full of fine goods. Seizing this opportunity, he went to talk to the man. "Excuse me sir, but do you like riddles? I am no master riddle teller, but I know a few puzzling ones." The man nodded, and tortoise kept going. "Perhaps we should play a game. Every time I ask you a riddle you can not guess, you must give me one thing of my asking, and every time you ask me a riddle I can not guess, I will give you one of my beautiful feathers."
The man agreed, and soon the two exchanged riddles. "What has as many eyes as it has legs?" asked tortoise. "Ah, but that is an easy one, the spider!" said the man. "What waves at you when you are going and waves at you when you are coming?" said the man. "Ah! A hard one, is it, palm fronds?" Now it was tortoise's turn again. "What is always black, red, and white at day, orange, blue, and green at night, and pink at noon?" he asked, smiling. As the man began to think, he didn't notice tortoise scurry into the carriage. "I don't know" said the man, so I ask you the same, "What is the answer to your riddle." Mbe sped off in the man's carriage, leaving one peacock feather at his feet.
Mbe the tortoise looked around the carriage for something expensive he could sell at market, and saw some Akwete cloth sitting in the back. When he got to market, he quickly grabbed some smooth rocks from the ground, and wrapped them in the cloth. He went directly to the marketplace of the richest trader and handed him the wrapped rocks.
"These are the finest gemstones in all of Africa" he said softly, as if he was letting the trader in on a secret. "They are so fine, that if you don't keep them wrapped in this cloth, everyone will go mad with awe and wonder, and attack you. I have tried to keep them, but they caused my visitors to go mad. So please, give me 100 gold pieces, and I will call it an even trade."
The trader was the greediest man in all of Igbo Land, so without hesitation he handed tortoise the gold pieces. "The cloth can only be opened in one hour" tortoise said, "when the power of the gems is weakest." Then, grabbing the gold pieces, he sped off towards the carriage.
With his gold pieces in the back, Mbe sped off in the carriage towards the watering hole of the elephants. He took off the feathers and hid them in the back with the gold pieces, then swam to the center of the watering hole. "Hello my good friends" he said, once he had their attention. "I was just wondering what you thought of the dinner the chief is having." He said.
"What dinner?" one of the oldest elephants asked, confused about the dinner. "Surely you, the animals with the best memory, have not forgotten. The chief sent an invitation to the strongest, smartest animals in the village to come eat with him and Uchenna. Why, didn't you see Lion rush off on this path to get to there in time for the feast?"
"I am sure we were not invited" said another elephant, angry. Mbe pretended to be sympathetic, and then told them "This is what we'll do. You should all come to the chief's hut with me. When I give the cue, trumpet until my new carriage reaches his door. Then, be silent. I will arrange for you to be brought in, but if even one of you says a thing to the chief, he may decide you're insolent, and never invite you back."
Mbe then climbed back into the carriage, put the feathers on, and gathered the gold pieces in his lap. Surrounded by the elephants and dressed finely, he looked like royalty.
When he was in sight of the hut, he signaled the elephants, who began to trumpet. Then, when they reached the door, he signaled them to stop, and he got out. Uchenna, looking out a window, saw the gold in his lap, and his fine feathered body, and waited in anticipation. The chief greeted him warmly at the door, and then lead him into a room.
"I assume you've come for Uchenna?" asked the chief, smiling. "Uchenna?" said tortoise, "I’m sorry, I don’t know anybody by that name. I merely came to chat with you sir. You see, I have recently inherited a large sum of money from a distant relative, and I've bought Lion's palace. I've become so wealthy, I had to have the elephants protect me, and trumpet so that anybody trying to steal my riches would become scared and run. But now, I need a bride. I was wondering if you knew anybody suitable."
The chief grinned and said "Uchenna, come here." She walked into the room, admiring Mbe’s finery and glancing out the window at his carriage with gold scattered all over the seats. “This is my beautiful daughter Uchenna” announced the chief. “You need look no further for a wife!”
"Uche, I have found you the richest man in Africa; do you wish to marry him?" Uchenna agreed, and Tortoise and the chief drew up the arrangements. Tortoise and Uchenna were to go down to his new palace for the night, and then the wedding would be held in the morning. As the two walked out the door to the chief's hut, the elephants, realizing there was no dinner, began to storm off.
"Aren't they protecting you?" said Uchenna, but before Mbe could respond, the Elephants said "We thought there was a feast. Deceit is not endearing!"
Uchenna, her eyes on the gold, the carriage, and Mbe's finery, quickly said "With me you need no guard. Let us go, I want to admire your looks and your wealth from inside the carriage. As they were driving back, Mbe and Uchenna passed the peacocks. "We want our feathers back" the birds called, outraged. They stormed upon him, and each took his feathers back until he was left with just his shell. Uchenna, focused on the carriage, the gold, and the palace dismissed it.
"So you are not handsome. My looks make up for the both of us." They drove along in silence, but as they passed the market, the trader came running up. "Those jewels you sold me were nothing but smooth rocks! I want my 100 pieces back!" He grabbed the money from the carriage, and threw the rocks at Tortoise.
Uchenna was beginning to grow suspicious, but her greed overcame her common sense. Tortoise began to be afraid and moved faster, trying to avoid seeing anybody else. Unfortunately for him, the man who he had riddled was able to stop them "I want my carriage back!" he called, and tortoise, not big enough to fight, gave it back.
Tortoise nervously led Uchenna on foot to Lion's large hut, and immediately she ran right in. Without any word of thanks or appreciation, she ran into the kitchen and began to familiarize herself. However, just when she was about to start making him dinner, Lion burst into his house, angry. "What are you still doing here, and why is the chief's daughter in my house. Whoever told you that Chikere wanted a fight was a liar."
After the two were thrown out by the angry lion, Uchenna's greed disappeared, and she saw the truth. "You're nothing but a poor, ugly tortoise!" she said, and she headed home. The wedding was called off, and tortoise, the foolish chief, and his greedy daughter Uchenna, were the laughing stock of the village for quite some time.
